Treat Yo Self To A Giant Mountain Dew Body Pillow, Because You're Worth It

Why seek human comfort when you could have a gigantic Mountain Dew body pillow instead? That's right; Mountain Dew is taking its marketing to a new, comfortable level with a humongous body pillow modeled after the sugary, high-fueled soft drink. Do you need one? No. Should you get one anyway? Absolutely. And you can do just that now because these comfy pieces of art are going on sale today through the Mountain Dew store (yes, the drink has a store). 

We're nearing the end of a global pandemic, hopefully, and you know what that means? We deserve good things. If the Tali from Mass Effect body pillow that we shared yesterday isn't your thing, do the dew instead: 

Given that this is one of the unofficial-yet-official Gamer Drinks Of Choice™, this meme-able piece of merch is actually kind of cool. Even if not for canoodling like the nice gentleman above. Wrap it around you like a pillow burrito while gaming for comfort, or mount it up on your front door to let your neighbors know you're completely off your rocker. Dealer's choice! 

“The Dew Body Pillow is a larger-than-life replica of a Mountain Dew bottle, perfect for those cold, winter nights when all you need is the comfort of your Mountain Dew to give you those warm, fuzzy feelings,” says an official press release about the latest Mountain Dew piece of memorabilia. A spokesperson at Mountain Dew added, jokingly telling Game Informer: "Post-pandemic dating has taken a turn for the worse. Ghosting has become the new normal, and it’s only expected to rise as things heat up this summer. If you or a loved one have fallen victim to ghosting, you may be entitled to cuddle compensation. So forget the attorney fees, and try your chance at winning your very own Dew body pillow."

Real talk? I'm going to rock the crap out of this. My partner might want to murder me, but it'd look pretty swanky next to my Garrus body pillow because who needs self-respect when you have comfort like this? 

This cozy piece of amazing is slated to go live in the Mountain Dew Store today. When this article was written, the listing wasn't live yet, but you can spam that refresh button like mad with this link here when they do come up for grabs.